Category Archives: Australia

Asian Men’s Shed cracks the whip

The first Asian Mens’ Shed established in Guangzhou China has been criticised for being “too productive” by the Australian Men’s Shed Association. Men’s Shed President Merv Dobson issued a “please explain” to the Guangzhou Shed after its members reported producing 250 000 Garfield tote bags in the 3 months since the Shed started.

“Men’s Sheds are supposed to be places where men can relax and talk about their issues,” Dobson told The Asia Beat, “not a kind of sweatshop. They should be concentrating on making wooden toys children won’t play with and having patents rejected for fuel saving carburettors.”

But the Guanzhou shed overseer, Feng Yunshan hit back, “That’s how these men relax, making tote bags. And they do talk about issues. Issues like, not enough tote bags. They share their feelings about not enough tote bags all the time.”

The Men’s Shed movement started in Australia in the 1990s to promote places that men could meet and relax and talk about their problems. It has spread to New Zealand, Ireland and the UK. The Guangzhou Men’s Shed, a sprawing 40 hectare factory complex on the banks of the Pearl River, will soon be joined by a sister – or rather brother “Mega Shed” in Shenzhen in 2013.

Guangzhou’s Men’s Shed up and running.

Gangnam style “not miracle worker.” – PSY

Lance Armstrong is making a desperate bid to save his reputation, flying to Melbourne to record a Gangnam promo with Korean superstar Psy currently on tour in Australia. Embattled Australian jockey Damian Oliver, yesterday accused of illegal betting has also contacted Psy for the same reason.

Psy told The Asia Beat, “I don’t make judgement. I’ll teach Lance and Damian the steps, but the rest is up to them. I’m expecting that Damian as a jockey will be a natural since the dance is based on horse riding, but he may crouch a little too low and far forward. Gangnam is a very unpright stance. More like riding a donkey. Lance of course will have the balance from cycling, but his upper body and whipping might need work.  But after Gangnam, they need to do their own thing. Gangnam has power, but it is not a miracle worker.

Armstrong and Oliver are expected to learn the steps on a stage at Melbourne’s Federation Square on Friday.

gangnam salvation

gangnam salvation

Racist Aussies Shun “Asian” Highway

Tens of thousands of motorists in Perth Western Australia are avoiding one of the city’s major arterial Roads – Tonkin Highway in the mistaken belief that it is named after the Gulf of Tonkin between Vietnam and Southern China. In reality the highway is named after John Tonkin, a  former Labor Party Premier in the 1970s, but racist Western Australian motorists haven’t let the facts get in the way of their bigotry, and the almost deserted weed covered 6 lane freeway is constantly defaced with anti Asian slogans. “I’m not driving down some “slant eyed” road, one road user told The Asia beat. I’d rather add an hour to my trip and drive down Leach Highway and Abernethy Road, then cut through Alexander Drive to Reid Highway. A few drivers have defied the trend at least in theory. Alex Bainbridge of The Socialist Alliance said, “I f I had a car, or any prospect of owning a vehicle, or if vehicles were “socialised”,  I would drive on it every day. Totally.”

Tonkin Highway – infested with weeds and racists.

 

Western Australian Transport Minister Troy Buswell refused to comment on rumours that Tonkin Highway is to be renamed Prince Charles Highway.

The Asia Beat Perth.

Holden won’t recall “blessed” V8’s

Some Muslim workers at Holden’s Elizabeth plant have admitted that they have been  surreptitiously giving “Islamic blessings” to V8 Commodore utes coming off the South Australian production line for months. A spokesman for the iconic Australian carmaker told The Asia Beat that Holden had no intention of recalling the vehicles. However he did say that the workers in question have been warned that they must respect the separation of “Church and ute”, and that the blessings should be stopped.

Opposition immigration spokesman Scott Morrison called on Holden to fund “exorcisms” or at the very least full detailing and called on the Immigration Department to investigate deportation options . “Young men, young Christian men have the right to know that their own vehicle might be plotting behind their backs.”

Mr Morrison was set to be disappointed, as all the men, originally from Iran, were long time Australian citizens according to Holden.

The former mufti of Australia Sheik Taj Din al Hilali, known for his extreme views on women and Jews, called on the Holden workers to defy the ban and extend their blessings to the Caprice and Calais.